Class, if I’d…

ADVENTURES IN PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION: Class, if I’d…
– by Ken Bolding

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Some (possibly slightly crazy) Guy: (screaming from across the street) You going golfing?

Me: No. Photography.

I arrive at the bus stop, and set down my bags. Guy crosses the street and approaches.

Guy: What is that?

Me: Photography equipment.

Guy: (excited) But what’s that sticking out of your bag?!

Me: (sigh) It’s a collapsible frame for a piece of diffusion.

Guy eyes me suspiciously.

Guy: You from JPL? [NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory]

Me: No.

Guy: C’mon, really?

Me: No.

Guy stares at me for a few seconds, leans in, and then asks in a conspiratorial whisper, “you classified?”

Me: No.

Guy: Seriously, are you classified?

Me: No.

Guy: I don’t know if I believe you… (accusingly) You smell like skunkworks!

He takes a moment and then suspects I might have misinterpreted his accusation as a dig against my personal hygiene, rather than as an accusation that I’m a scientist working on secret government projects.

Guy: I mean, you don’t actually smell at all. You smell like Purell… And you’re not classified? You don’t work for JPL?

Me: No.

Guy: Hmmm. (tentatively) OK… You have a good day.

Me: You too.

Author: Ken Bolding

Ken Bolding chronicles real-life events for the mild amusement of his tens of fans.

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